Madam, stand away from that bottle!
“I like to have a martini. Two at the most. After three I’m under the table. After four I’m under the host”
- Dorothy Parker
Sorry, that just makes me laugh so much.
But sadly there’s a serious point here and I’m finally taking my fingers out of my ears. I did try to skip through an article in this week’s Sunday Times, by the brilliant Adam Kay (former doctor and writer of This is Going to Hurt) on life after 40. The headline “It’s all downhill now, but how fast”, did not appeal I have to say. I just knew it - and there it was - the usual nagging advice about booze. Yes, yes I know “less is more”, have three alcohol free days a week and don’t drink more than 14 units a week. Don’t these medics realise just how flippin hard this is - especially with nothing else to do.
Honestly! have they really considered how little 14 units a week actually is and who in their right mind ever thinks that a single gin and tonic really cuts it. To be fair I was a little shaken when I realised that the “proper” G&T’s that my partner was pouring were actually quadruple measures (shit - even I think that’s bad).
Now I have an image of myself as a super health conscious, lithe yoga bunny, who mainlines meditation and matcha green tea. “yeah right” says my darling daughter with that maddening eye roll that she so perfected aged 14. Why didn’t anybody warn you that having daughters is not for the faint-hearted, nor if you want to rest into your dotage under the blissful illusion of past, or present, saintly behaviour.
In all honesty I do now live a really healthy life. I don’t believe that one can live their best possible life, or be emotionally and physically heathy living off a diet of junk food, social media and endless reality TV shows. I do think we all have to be very mindful of everything that we consumer - in all ways. But the drink thing - this is my last real battle. I’ve been kidding myself re the “little of what you fancy” - but that little has crept up into a daily habit. Not a big one, but enough to make me question can I get through a pandemic day without the six o’clock closing the day tipple.
And apparently I’m not alone. Waitrose says that 25 per cent of us have reported drinking more during lockdown. Meanwhile sales of liqueurs are up by 78%, cocktail ingredients are up by 48%, and tequila sales have almost doubled.
Yup the medical stuff on booze is very dispiriting (if you forgive the pun). So in line with guidance re cognitive behavioural therapy on habits, I’m flipping this round and going to focus on the positive stuff. Here goes. According to the Priory Group:
After one week of no alcohol sleep improves. Apparently that dozing off thing after a glass or two means that you miss the important rapid eye movement (REM sleep). Apparently you are supposed to have between six and seven cycles of REM sleep a night, you typically only have one or two when you’ve been drinking.
You lose weight and actually eat less. Sleep helps to balance the hormones that make you feel hungry or full. After drinking, your Ghrelin levels (the hormone that makes you feel hungry) go up and leptin (the hormones that make you feel full) go down.
Wine is hugely fattening! My daily drinking of at least one glass of wine (175ml) a day adds up to a whopping 1,170 calories - equivalent to four burgers or six and a half bags of crisps.
No more acid reflux - a real problem for a lot of people in middle age and aggravated by drink
Money saved - I actually now have to look away as my penchant for a white Burgundy had embedded from a once in a while treat to “nothing else will do”. I can’t even admit the price to myself.
better skin, better kidney, liver, heart health. Heavens if this was a magic health pill - this not drinking thing - we could all make a fortune.
But I do love a drink, and I’m Irish (it always feels like the ultimate excuse). And my friend Cesare, who’s a top research doctor and Italian (so he understands:) smiles when I ask “It’s going to kill me prematurely isn’t it.” He says something very noncommittal like: “well it’s always very complicated with these things… in moderation it could possibly be ok”. Note, he doesn’t say no.
I’m rather enjoying life and would love quite a few more years as I feel I have so much to do, so yesterday I made the commitment on a very moderate no drinking plan. Thinking of my SMART objectives, I reckoned that realistic needs to be factored in. So here I go THREE whole days a week with no alcohol. And I’m taking no chances, I’m following all the guidance - don’t go anywhere where there’s alcohol (the kitchen in my case), avoid people who you’ve normally drunk with (that’s all of my friends) and stick to a regime that provides something fun to do at the time you normally drink. Racking my brains about what to do at 6pm. Oh God this is going to be hard …..
I’ll keep you posted and maybe you’ll join me? I need some new non-drinking friends apparently and definitely lots and lots of encouragement
Warmest
Debbie x
p.s. Alcohol plays a part in 55% of domestic violence cases. As we’ve been told alcohol consumption and incidences of domestic violence have skyrocketed during lockdown. My Burgundy money is now going straight to www.womensaid.org.uk. A wonderful and hugely important organisation. This might just keep me on the straight and narrow.